July 10, 2017 in: Top Tips to Use When Older Parents Do Not Follow Advice,
Are you having a difficult time taking care of your old parents?
If so, rest assured that you are not alone.
No matter you are doing it out of love or you feel dutiful, looking after your aging parents is not an easy task and a lot of people have really hard time doing that. They often deny the help they are really in need of, sometimes they make unwise decision and at times they are just doing or saying things that do not make any sense to you. The situation poses a dilemma to the children; they want to help their parents, but at the same time they often get irritated and angry over the way aging parents behave and react to certain situations.
A research study jointly conducted by the New Jersey Institute for Successful Aging, Penn State University and the Rowan University of Osteopathic Medicine, reported that about 77% of adult children are of the view that when it comes to getting help and taking their advice, their parents get stubborn.
Are you the one who is trying to enter the potentially tense territory that your old parents have created around themselves?
If yes, then you have come to the right place.
Here, we are listing some tips one should make use of when the senior members of family refuse to listen and follow the advice you are giving for their benefit:
No one really like the judgments other pass about their personality or life. Same is the case with criticism. When it comes to aging parents, they really do not like being told, especially by their own children, how they should they spend their lives, manage things and that the decision they are taking is wrong. Also, people become highly sensitive with the increasing age.
So, you too have to act in sensitive manner and be very gentle and kind when dealing with your old parents. Instead of giving orders, keep your tone low and choose words carefully.
If you are going to have a conversation with your old parents with the expectation that all the issues will be resolved in one meeting, then we are afraid to tell that you are wrong. Making people change their mind about anything gets difficult as they grow old. So, be prepared for a couple of conversations (or even more) that end without reaching to a solution or consensus.
While you may feel like doing this at times, refrain from forcing and pushing your parents to do anything they are not ready for. This will only make the situation worse and it is highly likely that they will get upset or angry and start arguing and yelling as a result. Instead, make them agree to whatever you want them to do through conversation.
Remember that you can always seek help and there is nothing wrong in that. If you feel that you cannot take care of your parents or they are not listening to you at all, look for a professional caregiver. Since they are experts of the field, they know how to deal with the tantrums, mood swings and behavioral issues that come with the increasing age.